There I was, sitting at the desk in the hotel room pounding out some kind of worthless drivel on the laptop with the TV on next to me when I heard her say “Vampires Beware!“

Now, of course, that WOULD get my attention because sometimes I consider myself to be, if not a vampire, then at least sympathetic to their… lifestyle. After all, my internal body clock has always been set to sleep during the day and do my work at night and, before I married my beloved Cindy, I was known for being extremely attracted to beautiful female necks. Plus, although I’m definitely NOT, I always felt like immortality might be pretty cool.

So, when those words, “Vampires Beware!” penetrated my concentration, I swiftly looked toward the TV to see what is was they should beware. Ya know…just in case. What I saw was an attractive blonde female on the right lower corner of the screen with a local car dealership in the opposite corner and various vehicles in the background. Then she repeated her earlier warning. Except this time, with the added visual assistance and my concentration focused on what she was saying, I realized what she had said was…

“Van Buyers Compare!”

I swear it’s these darn local Louisiana accents.